Forever & Always, I Promise
by cassiev91
Summary: First story i've ever wrote on here so please be kind. Kenzie Sherwood leaves her home in SC and moves to LA to finish her degree. She never expects to meet & fall in love with Kendall Schmidt from BTR
1. Chapter 1

**_~18 Months Earlier~_**

"Okay guys I'm all packed", I yelled to my mom and dad.

"Wait! Wait! Just one more picture! Frank come get with Kenzie for a picture!" mom yelled.

"Now Kenz you have the extra cash I gave you? And the map? Do you have a full tank of gas? Oh right we're driving you to the airport! What else am I forgetting", dad said.

"Yes, yes and I have the mace you left in my suitcase", I smiled up at my dad Frank.

"Very good kid! I knew I was forgetting something I knew you'd need while on your own"

"Really dad I'll be ok. My sister is out there and so are Jeremy and Tanya. Trust me if I need anything all three of them will be there in a jiff."

"I know. I just never thought my little girl would be leaving her old man to go to school out in California".

"I know dad". I didn't know what to else to say to my dad. He looked so sad. His only daughter moving away to finish her doctorate in veterinarian medicine clear in Los Angeles, California.

"Ok Kenzie and Frank, it's time to go", mom, Denise, said.

At the airport I checked my luggage and waited for my flight to be called. It never really sank in until this moment that I would be moving over 1000 miles away from my dad and mom. Denise wasn't my real mom but she was the one who raised me and helped me grow into the woman I am today. I will always be grateful to her. In a few months I will have to fly home again to be with her before my new sibling arrives, since chances are my dad will be deployed overseas again. I guess that's what happens when you're married to the army.

Resting my head on my dad's shoulder for what felt like eternity and the final time, my flight was called overhead.

"Wellll parentals it's time for me to go", I said trying to lighten the mood.

As my mom choked back tears and gave me one last hug and kiss and said "Make us proud sweetie, I love you".

My dad had more of a different approach. "Well I guess it's time to say bye for now."

He pulled me in for a big hug and whispered "Please be safe Kenzie".

"I will daddy, I love you. I love you both" I said walking toward the terminal.

I will never forget the look in my dad's eyes as I walked away. So much sadness and happiness at once. I held back my tears until I was on the plane and then they fell freely.

"Come on frank. She's on the plane now. It will be ok."

"I just need to see the plane take off safely D."

And just like that my plane took off leaving behind my world.

After a long flight and finally arriving in LA I was greeted by my sister Elle and my brother Jeremy and his wife Tanya. Although I was happy to see them I was also sad and homesick.

"So little sis you ready to hit the beach and meet some guys?" Elle said excitedly.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa Elle she hasn't even been here 15 minutes and you're already trying to get her a man? Little sis you aint dating no one. EVER!" Oh my protective brother Jeremy.

"Well I'm just excited you're finally here Kenzie!" Tanya was always so calm and always made me feel at peace.

"I think I just want to get to my place and unpack and sleep"

"Well then away we go sis", Jeremy said.

As we arrived to my place I forgot I lived next to my sister in a small gated community, so I knew she would be over frequently. My adorable blue ranch style home. It had a small fence around my front porch and gorgeous rose bushes all around the side and front of the house. I also forgot how big it was on the inside. 3 bathrooms and bedrooms. A medium sized kitchen, which was ok seeing how I hardly cooked except when I couldn't sleep at night. And a spacious living room and home office. Definitely too big for one person but maybe once I got some dogs running around in here it wouldn't be so bad. Time to make it home.

I began unpacking with my brother and sisters help, and of course Tanya was there. As it grew near 7pm I was exhausted. It would take time getting used to California time zone. I said goodbye to everyone and went to sleep in my new bedroom. As tired as I was, I couldn't sleep. So I got up and decided to bake. But dummy me forgot I didn't have anything in my house so I got into my car and looked up the closest store and went there. It was 8:30pm and thankfully the store didn't close until 11.

As I was shopping, I wasn't paying attention to where I was going and I ran straight into someone.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! I really should have been looking at where I was going! Are you ok?"

I looked up to meet the most tantalizing pair of green eyes I have ever seen. My God he looked so familiar. I couldn't put my finger on it.

He smiled an adorable dimpled smile and I immediately felt my face get warm. This meant I was blushing like a fool.

"It's no problem. I guess I should've said something when I seen you coming towards my cart."

"You mean you saw me coming?"

He smirked and tried to hide his amusement at what I just said.

"I me-mean-meant walking into your cart."

As if I could blush anymore, I think I just did.

"Yea, well it's not every day you get a pretty girl in sweats, t-shirt and flip flops shopping this late at night. Plus I've never seen you in here before."

He looked me up and down and smiled a playful grin.

"Well you must shop here a lot to notice I've never been here and the reason for that is I just moved here."

"I do actually shop here a lot. When I'm home."

"I see. Well ok I guess I will be going now. … oh and sorry again. Are you sure I can't make it up to you?"

"Nah its cool. Maybe I'll see you around."

"Ok well maybe"

He smiled that dimpled smile and I couldn't help but blush and smile a goofy grin back. I don't think I've ever hurried out of a store so fast.

Back home I couldn't help but keep smiling. So I turned on some of my favorite Big Time Rush tunes and started baking. Before I knew it I baked everything you could imagine. Cupcakes, cinnamon rolls, cheesecake, cookies. My kitchen was a disaster! Oh well it could wait until later. I was exhausted.

I woke up with a strange feeling inside me. Like something exciting and new was going to happen today. I cleaned up my kitchen when my sister started pounding on my door.

"Kenzie! Open the door!"

"Ok! Geesh I'm comin!"

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"You're coming to work with me today… Oh my heavens what happened in here?"

"Oh um I got bored last night and decided to bake a whole bunch of stuff" I snickered.

"Well any who go get ready. We leave in 45 minutes and can we take this stuff? I know some people who would love to eat all that."

"Yea um just start packing it up and I will be ready."

45 minutes later I was dressed and ready to go and so were all my goodies I baked.

We arrived to a studio lot and quickly parked. I saw the back of someone who looked oddly familiar. He turned around and I felt my heart stop.

"Oh God, Oh God, Oh God" I kept saying over and over.

"Kenz what is wrong with you?" Elle asked.

"Oh crap its him."

"Wait! What? Who is him? I'm so confused."

"Why didn't you tell me you worked in the same place as Kendall Schmidt from BIG TIME FRIGGIN RUSH!?"

"He-he! I guess I forgot to mention I'm their make-up artist and assistant."

I could only imagine the look on my face from my sister's amusement.

"You didn't think it would be wise to tell me?"

"No"

"Gee thanks... look I can't go into there. I ran my cart into him last night and he flirted and said he hoped he'd see me around. I don't want him to think I'm stalking him! Or going all fan girl on him!"

"Geesh Kenz chill out. Wait you hit him with your cart? Ha! That's funny. Anyway I told him all about you so just be yourself. I even told him you were a fan and that you weren't one of the crazy girls they meet."

"Did you tell him what I look like?"

"Well I described you to him, but I don't think he'll know who you are right off the bat. Besides I didn't show him a picture of you. So it's not like he knew who you were in the store last night."

"Oh God, I feel like I'm going to faint."

"Oh please don't."

In addition to feeling like I could faint, I felt like I could vomit as well. I put on a brave face and we made our way into the studio. My sister was busy greeting everyone and introducing me but my mind was a million miles away. I was hoping I wouldn't run into him. What would I say? How did I not recognize him in the store?

"Hey Elle! Ready to glamify me?"

Oh no... no no, no this could not be happening.

"Hey James I want you to meet my sister Kenzie. She just moved here from south Carolina."

Oh thank God it was James! Oh crap James Maslow!

"Well hellllo Kenzie. We have heard nothing but good things about you. My pleasure to meet you."

Did he seriously just wink and kiss my hand? _Remember to breathe Kenzie._ Damn he's good looking!

"It's nice to meet you too James."

"James where are the others? I can't glamify you all in 2 hours if you're all not here."

"Chill Elle, they're on their way up. You know how Logan is with his car. That's his life!"

Just then a medium height guy with dark brown hair, chocolate eyes and ivory skin came walking towards us.

"I thought I heard my name being said!"

Oh God Logan Henderson. What the hell was my sister thinking of doing this to me?! He noticed me sitting there and turned to me with his Texas drawl.

"Well hi there. My names Logan. And you must be the little sister Elle talks about so much. But from the looks of you, you're not so little. You're a beautiful grown woman."

Oh Lord already laying it on thick.

"Hi nice to meet you. I'm Kenzie."

"And she has a twang. Me likey."

"Logan shut up before you scare my only sister back to South Carolina."

"Sorry I will behave. I can be a gentleman."

"You better be."

"Hey guys! have you seen my helmet? I can't find it and we start shooting in an hour and a half."

"It's in with the props Carlos. Hey Carlos before you run off this is my sister Kenzie."

"Hi Kenzie, it's nice to meet you. Have you seen the prop box?"

"Hi Carlos, it's nice to meet you as well. I can't say that I have."

"Oh shoot. Well thanks anyway guys."

Oh no! I've met 3 of the 4 guys and that means there's one more…. Kendall.

"I FOUND IT!" Carlos shouted from the hallway.

"Hey I'm gonna run to the car and grab all that food and stuff."

I was trying to give my sister the hint I didn't want to be around when Kendall came in.

"Oh ok here's the keys and here's a badge so you can get back in."

"Ok be back soon."

Thank God she got the hint. As I was walking down the hallway my mind was just as jumbled as it was last night. Just then I hit something hard.

"Owwww!"

"Oh crap! I'm so sorry. I really need to pay attention." That angelic voice said.

"It's oooo…"

And I was met with those pair of green eyes that just stopped my heart.

"Hhhheeeyy. I gotta go."

And off I took.

As I made my way back into the dressing room. I prayed silently that Kendall wasn't in there. But as fate would have it I met those green eyes as soon as I walked into the door.

"Hey Kenz, you're finally back! Carlos has been hounding me when you were gonna bring in all the goodies. Oh and this is Kendall!"

"Yea it took me awhile to get everything in one trip." I laughed nervously. Trying to avoid Kendall's stare.

"Hi Kenzie, I'm Kendall. It's nice to finally meet you in person", he said with a wink.

Oh hell no. Kendall Schmidt just winked at me.

"I know right."

Smooth Kenzie.

"Hey guys Kenzie brought the food in so dig in!" Elle yelled.

And they all came running in. Of course Carlos was first.

"She made cheesecake!"

"And cinnamon rolls"

Kendall's eyes lit up. "Out of my way! I call dibs on the rolls."

I looked over at my sister who had a smug grin on her face. Oh she knew what she was doing. All I could do was glare at her.

"Wow Elle your sister sure knows how to make a guy happy", Carlos said with a mouth fool.

All 4 boys stuffing their faces with the food I made just gave me butterflies. How can they have that effect on a girl. It should be illegal.

Just then a page came over head telling the boys production needed them on set. Which meant they would be gone and so would Elle. That would give me time with my own thoughts and to gather myself mentally. I thought I would call my mom. Surely she could give me some advice.

As I dialed her number I got emotional just thinking of hearing her voice on the other line.

"Hello."

"Hey mom!"

"Hey sweetie! How's it going? Are you ok?"

"It's going good. I'm ok. Just a little conflicted."

"Conflicted? How Kenzie?"

There was the worry tone in my mom's voice.

I proceeded to explain to her everything with Kendall. She told me just to be myself and act like nothing. Be polite and make small talk with him and see where things go.

"Oh wait! Do you want to talk to your dad?"

"Uh yes!"

I talked to my dad for a good hour and then we said our goodbyes. After the call a few tears slipped and I just felt more homesick. I just had to keep telling myself I could do this.

After a few hours of waiting everyone came back in the room. And then everything shifted. The boys wanted to know everything about me. I told them how I got accepted into UCLA'S veterinarian program and I would be starting in the fall. And told them all the things I enjoyed doing in my spare time. They seemed so intrigued by me and I couldn't figure out why.

The boys decided since they had the next few weeks off that all of you should hang out. It couldn't hurt to make new friends. So I agreed. We all exchanged numbers and they said they hoped to hear from me soon. But chances are they would contact me first. They were just that sweet and I was too shy to contact them. But out of all the boys, I was secretly hoping Kendall would text me.


	2. Is It Love

I've been living in LA for about 6 months now and I've spent a lot of time at school and working. Plus any free moment I get I hang out with Logan, Carlos, Kendall, and James. Kendall wasn't the first one to text me. In fact he was the last. Logan texted me first and then the others followed suit. Here lately things have been awkward with all the guys. They seemed to be acting strange around me, especially Kendall. He won't be alone in a room with me for more than a few minutes. The guys always seem to try to ditch him with me whenever we hang out.

After I got off work early one day, I found all four of them outside of my house, sitting on my porch. As I got closer I saw Sammy and Halston as well. Carlos and James' girlfriends.

"Get your beach gear", James said.

"Why?"

"Uh because we're going to the beach duh!"

I laughed at his sarcasm. James felt like another brother to me and he told me on many occasions he loved me like his other sister.

I told them to give me 15 minutes and then I would be ready to go.

As soon as I was ready we piled into 2 different cars. I rode with James and his girlfriend Halston and Logan. Carlos, his girlfriend Sammy, and Kendall rode in the other.

"So Kenzie what's the dealio with Kendall and you", Logan asked.

"Um I'm not sure what you mean Logan."

"I mean the way you two look at each other. It's literally indescribable. It's pretty obvious there's a spark there. "

"Well nothing is going on. We're just friends."

"But do you want to be me more with Kendall", James asked.

"I don't know." I said quietly. I honestly didn't know. I didn't even know how Kendall felt about me. Sure we flirted a lot but he never made his intentions clear. I wasn't sure if the feelings I had for Kendall were for love or for friendship.

"You two leave her alone!"

Thank God for Halston for giving them something else to talk about.

We arrived at the beach at about 6. We would have been there sooner if Carlos hadn't gotten hungry on the way there. We laid out our blankets and towels and ran towards the ocean water and waves. After about an hour of playing in the water and surfing, I decided to go sit on my blanket and start watching the amazing California sunset.

I closed my eyes when I felt a shadow standing over me. Something in my body just told me it was Kendall.

"What's up Kendall?"

I could tell he was grinning.

"How'd you know it was me?"

Oh Kendall if you only knew the impact you had one me. I could sense his presence from a mile away. He had that kind of effect on me.

"You're the only one with a tall lanky shadow", I teased him and he laughed.

"Mind if I sit with you?"

"Nope not at all", I said. Trying to hold back my growing smile. I gestured for him to sit next to me on my spacious blanket.

"So how's it going Kenz?"

I couldn't help but giggle at his awkwardness.

"It's going good Kends", we both start to giggle at the nickname i just gave Kendall.

"So I was thinking maybe we should go out sometime."

"Oh you were, were you….. I think that would be nice."

I could feel the butterflies in my stomach getting worse. I have waited for this moment for such a long time and finally it was happening.

"Really?", he asks surprised.

"Yep."

Before I knew it, we both were drawn into conversation with each other. Casually holding hands and sometimes I was laying my head on his shoulder watching the sunset and saying nothing. Just sweet silence between us. No words needed to be said. We understood each other's vibes. Before we knew it the sun had fully set and everyone was tired and ready to go. Instead of riding with Logan, James and Halston, I decided to ride with Carlos, Sammy and Kendall. As we reached my house Kendall walked me to the door.

"So I guess I will text you about our date", Kendall says grinning.

"Yea sounds good."

We both stood there for a few minutes staring at each other and smiling like dorks until we heard a horn honk and realized Carlos and Sammy were still waiting. I gave Kendall a friendly hug bye and a quick kiss on the cheek before entering my house. Standing against the door I finally felt like I belonged and that good things were finally going to happen.

I woke up with a start to my phone ringing at 3:45 in the morning. I looked at the caller ID and see its dad. Instantly I began to worry something's wrong.

"Hey dad. What's up? Is everything ok? What's going on?"

"Your mom is in labor!"

"Oh wow, oh wow, um ok I will book the next flight and be home as soon as I can!"

"HURRY!"

I quickly booked my flight, hurriedly packed a bag and carry on and soon headed to the airport. My sister wasn't too thrilled I had to wake her up in the middle of the night to take me to the airport but she wasn't to upset when I told her my mom was having the baby.

Before I boarded my flight, i sent a quick text to Jeremy and Tanya letting them know about mom and then I sent one to Kendall.

_Hey Kendall, I'm going to be out of town for a couple of weeks with my family. I will let you know when I'm back so we can go on that date J xoxo Kenzie._

As soon as I finished my text it's time to leave. I slept on the plane since I didn't have much sleep anyway. Before I know it my planes landed and I'm greeted by my grandparents with open arms.

As we made our way to the hospital, I caught up with my grandma and grandpa. They told me how proud of me they are and how much they miss me. It makes me miss them even more. When I got to the hospital I jumped out of the car and didn't wait for my grandparents. I found my dad waiting for me inside the hospital entrance grinning from ear to ear.

"Hey daddy!"

"There's my buttercup!"

"So do we have a baby or is she still screaming and everything, demanding for another epidural?" I joked.

"You have a new baby sister. Wanna see her?"

"What do you think?"

I couldn't help but share the same smile my dad had plastered on his face.

We made our way to the maternity ward and to my mom's room. Inside she's holding a small bundle all in pink. She sees me and beams from ear to ear with tears in her eyes.

"Meet your sister Molly Elizabeth Sherwood."

"She has the same middle name as me", I say as tears filled my eyes.

"Do you want to hold her?"

"Absolutely!"

As I held my new baby sister i felt my phone go off in my pocket. I see i have a text from Kendall:

_Why did you have to go out of town? Are you ok?_

I smiled at his text, getting butterflies that he's worried about me. I quickly reply back;

_Well because I'm a big sister! And I am more than ok!_

I attached a picture of me and molly and sent it to Kendall.

I soon got a text back saying:

_Aww cute! She kind of looks like you, dark hair, pretty eyes. And I look forward to our date J_

I start to smile even bigger and mom notices the change in me. As soon as dad is out of the room she asks me why I'm so happy and of course I told her about Kendall and about the connection we have and how he makes me feel like I'm the only girl in the world. I told her about the date we will be going on when I get back and she suggested that I ask him to Elle's wedding.

Later that evening I sent Kendall a text about what he would think of being my date to Elle's wedding, he's already invited and so are the other boys. I thought what harm could it do to just take him as my plus one instead, I know it would make Elle happy to see that:

_Sooo I was thinking that maybe you would wanna be my date to my sister's wedding next week? Yes? No? MAYBE? J_

I quickly got a text back from Kendall saying:

_I'll think about it ;)_

Before I could even reply I instantly got another text from him:

_So I thought about it….. And the answer is…..Of course! J_

I immediately felt relief and more butterflies. I went to bed that night feeling like the luckiest girl in the world. I just worried I was getting in too deep.

Soon enough it was time to head back to California. I had to leave my family again plus it was even harder to leave my new sister. But Elle needed me. I'm her maid of honor and the wedding was only a couple of days away. I found a note in my bag from mom saying

_"Good luck and everything will work out like it should!"_

Elle picked me up from the airport and we finished all the last minute wedding details. By the time we got home i was tired, grumpy and super jet lagged. All I really wanted was a shower and my bed.

After I got out of the shower I heard a faint tapping sound on my window. I peeked out the window and see a tall, lanky figure on my porch. I didn't know who it was or why they were at my house at 2:30 in the morning so i grabbed the mace dad packed me and was ready to go in case it was an intruder. Soon the figure started pounding on my door. This time I peeked through the peep hole and felt instant relief at the figure behind my door.

Kendall. At least that's who I was hoping for. I carefully opened my door, mace in hand and ready to attack and then my worries ceased when i seen his face.

"Hey Kenzie! Sorry if I scared you. I just wanted to make sure you got home ok. You didn't text me or anything." He said as he was looking at the can of mace in my hand.

"Hi Kendall. It's all good. Sorry about that. My sister has had me all over LA for wedding stuff. Do you want to come in?"

"Really? Um sure."

I smiled at him as stepped into my house. He stopped and looked at everything. Admiring what I did to my place. All the pictures of my family and accomplishments.

"Do you watch Family Guy?"

Kendall stares at me with surprise and shock. "That is my absolutely favorite show!"

"Do you want to watch it with me?"

"Heck yes!"

We sat on the couch and I start the show from the beginning. We both would laugh at the same things and make jokes with each other, even mocking the characters sometimes. I didn't realize that i was cuddled against Kendall. He must not have minded because he laid his head on top of mine. He picked up one of my hands and played with it while we both watched the show. Soon it was 5am and Kendall said he had to leave leave. Immediately I felt sad at the thought of him leaving but I didn't want him to see. I couldn't help but feel the sparks between us. Surely he felt the same thing; otherwise he wouldn't have held my hand and cuddled with me. And his smell nearly drove me wild. Axe phoenix. That is a smell I will never forget.

Two days later is Elle's wedding and everything is going great. She looks stunning in her Vera Wang wedding gown. All the bridesmaids look beautiful with their off shoulder floor length black dresses. Kendall was supposed to meet me at the church since I had to be there super early to help with decorations and everything. I didn't see him arrive with the boys and I think the worse that he's stood me up. I was trying to get Logan, Carlos' or James attention but they were so into the wedding and their dates that they didn't even look at me. I tried not to act sad since this was Elle's big day but I couldn't help but feel disappointed. Before I knew it, it's time to start walking down the aisle. As I stood at my designated spot at the alter and wait for Elle to come down the aisle, i spot Carlos, Logan, James, Sammy, Halston and Logan's date. But no Kendall. They each give me a little wave and I tried to mouth "where's Kendall" but of course they can't read lips.

I tried to not to think about him as the wedding progressed. And soon enough the ceremony is over and we're walking back towards the exit into the reception line. I caught a glimpse of a guy with dirty blonde hair. I tried to turn my head to get a better look but it was too late.

I greeted everyone at the reception and all of a sudden I received a text.

_It's not nice to show up the bride ;)_

I replied back.

_Kendall?_

And another text comes in.

_Yes?_

Now I'm mad. How does he know what I look like? He wasn't there to see me. I decided to say something to him.

_I thought we had a date tonight. I looked everywhere for you at the church and you were nowhere to be found. So talk about me showing up the bride since you showed me up!_

I didn't receive a text back and i started to feel bad for going off on him. But my feelings were hurt too!

The reception is in full swing. My feet are killing me from the 5 inch heels Elle insisted on me wearing and from dancing. I sat at one of the tables to take them off when i felt a hand on my shoulder.

I turned to see Logan.

"You ok kenzie?"

"Uh yea, you know my feet just hurt."

I tried my best to put on a fake smile. But he wasn't convinced.

"It's Kendall isn't it?"

"It's not a big deal Logan."

"Come with me."

"Why?"

"Just come on you'll see."

I walked out onto the beach with Logan and see all the guys gathered around a bonfire. What I didn't expect to see was Kendall. He looked so gorgeous in a black suit and his hair all smoothed out. I stopped dead in my tracks. I couldn't understand why he looked sad. He was the one who hurt me!

"Kenzie, come sit over here." I was pulled out of my thoughts by Halston.

"You look so pretty Kenzie.", said Sammy.

"Thanks."

I tried not to blush. I didn't like being complimented.

"She looks more than pretty, she looks beautiful."

I turned and seen that it was Kendall who spoke.

"Kenz, can we go talk somewhere?"

I didn't know what to say, so I just nodded.

We walked for a while before either of us said something. Finally Kendall stopped and turned towards me. Looking me dead in the eye. I wanted to avoid his gaze but I couldn't. I was so drawn to him.

"Kenzie, I was at the church today. I had car trouble and I got there late. By the time I got there the wedding started so I just sat in the back so I wouldn't disrupt anything."

"Ok."

I didn't know what to say.

"Ok? Really all you're going to say is ok?"

He seemed irritated.

"I don't know what you want me to say Kendall."

"Say something like "Oh Kendall, I know you would never stand me up, you've been looking forward to going out with me for months", I don't know something like that."

I couldn't help but laugh at the way he impersonated me. It was quite cute.

"So you didn't stand me up?"

"God no! Do you know how long I have been wanting to go out with you. I couldn't wait until you got home from South Carolina. That's why I came to see you that night."

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions. You could have at least told me you were going to be late. Or at least have one of the guys tell me."

"I did. Apparently they were too wrapped up in the ceremony and their girls that they forgot to tell you before it started."

"SORRY KENZIE", they shouted. I really thought we were further away from them. Little spies!

I started to laugh and put my hand into Kendall's. It felt so soft and warm and a little calloused from him playing guitars.

"Sorry our first date turned out so bad", I smiled up at him.

"It's ok we can make up for it some other time", he said as he smiled back down at me. Will I ever get used to how beautiful he is?

We both went back to the fire hand and hand with big smiles on our faces. Before we knew it, it was 4 in the morning and Kendall drove us to my house.

"Why don't you just stay here for the night or morning or whichever it is." You giggled.

"Are you sure?"

"Yea its really late or early and we're both tired and I don't want you driving home so sleep deprived."

"Ok, I can sleep on the couch."

"You don't have to. My beds big enough for both of us."

He gave me a surprised look.

"I mean if you want to sleep with me."

I realized what I said after a few moments plus Kendall's horrified look wasn't to amusing.

"Oh my gosh! I meant sleep next to me in my bed."

He shyly smiled and nodded. He followed me to my room and I showed him where everything was.

"Do you have an extra shirt or shorts or something I can sleep in?"

"Well I don't have shirts that will fit you but I have athletic shorts that will."

I mentally praised myself for the whole shirt bit. I had plenty of shirts to fit him; I just wanted to see him shirtless.

After I showered and changed it was Kendall's turn. When he walked out of the bathroom I tried to hold my containment in as he walked out shirtless and in his boxers. I tried not to gape at him but the way his shoulders were ripped and the way his muscles moved in his arm. Not to mention his six pack, was just too much to take in. What drew me in most was his tattoos. The stitched up heart on his left shoulder, his Scorpio zodiac sign on his left shoulder blade and the peace sign with the four elements in the middle of his shoulder blades. They were very intriguing.

He climbed in the bed beside me and looked at what I had on the screen.

"Family Guy?"

"Yep!"

"Your killing me girl. You're so damn awesome."

I didn't realize how close he was to my face as he said that. As I turned to smile at him our lips met. After a few seconds we broke apart. I could see the desire in Kendall's eyes for me. His once light green eyes were darker and more emerald. I smiled at him and kissed him again. This time with a little more passion. I could feel the sparks and connections between us. I pulled away after what seemed like forever. And we just gazed at each other sweetly.

Slowly I begin to trace his tattoo on his arm.

"Is this ok?"

All he did was nod his head and closed his eyes. I smiled at his perfection.

I kept tracing his arm until he lay on his stomach and then I began tracing his back tattoos. Soon enough I heard light snores from him and he was fast asleep. I draped my arm over him, holding him close to me and i soon followed suit.

Little did I know a little drama was lurking around the corner.


	3. Here Comes Goodbye

My phone woke me up blaring my Big Time Rush ringtone "Windows Down". I hoped Kendall didn't hear that. That would be a little embarrassing. I fell out of bed and found my phone on the charger under my bed. I wondered how it got there. I looked to see who it was.

_1 missed call from "mom". 1 new text message from "mom". Her message said:_

_Hey Kenzie! I'm going to send a Skype invite on your phone so I can see you!_

Soon enough I got the invite. I groggily went back to my bed and lay back down and waited for the screen to load with my mom's face.

"KENZIE!"

"Hi mom!" I tried to sound excited but I was just so dang tired. Plus I was trying to whisper so I wouldn't wake the sleeping figure next to me.

"How's everything going out there?"

"It's good, been busy studying and working and all that good stuff."

"How did your sister's wedding go?"

"Really good!"

"So did you and Kendall have a nice time together."

Just in that moment Kendall rolled over and threw his arm around me and mumbled something in his sleep. Immediately I froze because I knew my mom would see his arm around me and hear him.

"Kenzie Elizabeth Sherwood! Who and what is that in your bed?!"

"SHHH! Be quiet! That would be an arm in my bed and it belongs to Kendall." I said calmly.

"Kenzie did you two get intimate with each other last night?"

"Oh my God mom! NO! I have to go now. Love you!"

"Kenzie don't you dare hang up! Did you use protection! Kenzie! KENZIE!"

"Call you later mom! Love you bye!"

I hung up my phone and threw it across the room. I didn't care where it landed just as long as it was away from me. I turned over towards Kendall and found a pair of enchanting green eyes meeting mine.

"Hhheyy! Good morning!"

"Who were you talking to?"

"Oh just my mom. No big deal."

"Oh. Why did she think we had sex?"

"Umm no reason. She's my mom and worries I'll do something I'll regret." I said trying to sound cool about it.

"Do you regret having me stay last night?"

"What? Oh no! Of course not! I don't regret anything. I've been secretly hoping for it", I smiled at him.

"Really?" he smiled back at me.

"I mean yea! I like you a lot Kendall and I care for you."

"I feel that way about you Kenzie."

I smiled and said "Now that we've settled how we feel, I think I might try to get some more sleep since I was so rudely awoken this morning."

"Mind if I stay and keep sleeping next to you?"

"Nope." I yawned and quickly fell back into a peaceful slumber.

I woke up around noon and decided I should finally get up, though my body was telling me to keep sleeping. I didn't realize when I went to get up I was caught in between a pair of strong arms. _How could I keep forgetting Kendall was here?!_ I decided to turn into his chest and snuggle up against him and try to wake him up. That didn't work. I decided to just let him sleep and I got on with my day.

Around 3 in the afternoon Kendall emerged from my room, with nothing but the basketball shorts on and disheveled hair. Can this man get any more beautiful?

"Good morning sunshine!" I jokingly said to him.

"Ha-ha very funny Kenzie. Why did you let me sleep so late?"

"I didn't want to wake you. You looked like you needed the sleep." _Not to mention how adorable he looked cuddled up in my bed, I thought._

"Oh ok. Well thanks! I think I'm gonna run home and shower and change."

I tried to not look disappointed at the thought of him leaving. I really liked how he looked in my house.

"Ok."

"Um do you maybe want to do something later?"

"What did you have in mind?"

"How bout we order in and watch some movies?"

The thought of spending the evening with Kendall watching movies and possibly more cuddling and sleeping. That thought really made me smile.

"Sounds good. My place or yours?"

"I say here because your place is really cozy and comfy. And I really love being here with you". He smiled back at you. His face was a little red like he just admitted this huge secret.

"Ok sounds good. See you at 6?"

"You betcha!"

As I walked him to the door I wanted nothing more than to kiss him again. I didn't want to push my luck and make things awkward. Thing weren't awkward after we kissed last night. Maybe he wants to take things slow.

Kendall could see that I was thinking about something because of the disappointed look on my face.

"Hey Kenz… Helllooo earth to Kenzie!"

"What?"

"You ok sweetie? You look… maddish, almost kind of disappointed. Are you upset about something?" His voice was sweet and full of concern.

"Oh yea I'm totally fine! Just thinking about the phone call with my mom this morning. No worries!"

_Real good there Kenzie. Lie to him! _

"Ok well I'll be back in a couple of hours."

"Ok see you soon."

We both stood there staring at each other. Did he want me to kiss him? Or hug him?

I decided to move in for a hug since it seemed safest. He wrapped his warm arms around me and engulfed me into a bear hug. He looked down at me and smiled a warm genuine smile and kissed me briefly.

"I got to go. I'll be back soon", he whispered against my lips.

"Don't take too long", I said sweetly back to him.

We untangled ourselves and said goodbye. What was I going to do with myself for 2 hours without him. This can't be good that I already feel lonely without him here. I can't be falling for him already. I had a huge crush on him ever since I first met him but I couldn't understand the feelings I had for him now.

I decided to get a shower and straighten my house up again and call my mom. After I reassured her a thousand times that nothing sexual happened between me and Kendall besides kissing she let it go. She gave me bad news that my dad had been deployed again. She didn't know how long this time. About the time I was getting ready to hang up with her I heard a knock on my door. I couldn't wait to see Kendall, especially after the news I just got. Only when I opened my door it wasn't him.

It was Logan.

"Hey Logan! What are you doing here?"

I tried not to sound irritated but I was really hoping it was Kendall.

"Um there's something you should know about Kendall", he sounded scared to death.


	4. Bring on the Pain

"Is he ok? Please tell me he's ok Logan!"

"Can I come in?"

I let him into the house and we sat on the couch. I painfully waited for him to continue. Thinking of the worst possible scenarios.

"He's ok. He's not hurt or anything like that but I'm afraid you're going to get hurt."

"Hurt how Logan? And why couldn't you just come out and say that instead of making me think something horrible happened to him!"

Now I was really getting irritated and upset. I wanted to hit Logan for making me scared.

"Kenzie, I don't know any other way to put this, so I'm just going to say it… He's back with his ex-girlfriend. She just got back into town and was waiting for Kendall outside his parent's house and I don't know they just clicked together again. And I guess now they're together."

"I see", was all I could manage to say. "Well thanks Logan for telling me. I um have to be somewhere tonight so if you'll excuse me."

"It's gonna be ok Kenzie."

Oh Logan if you only knew it wasn't going to be ok.

"I'll show you out."

After Logan left, I found my phone and found I had one unread message.

_Hey Kenzie. I won't be able to make it over tonight. Something's come up._

Yea I know what came up. I wasn't sure how to feel. I felt hurt more than anything but there was something else I felt and I couldn't figure it out.

The next few days I kept myself busy. Working doubles and staying up late studying and attending classes. Anything I could do to keep my mind off of Kendall. His mom texted me a few times to see how I was doing. She was such a sweetheart.

_Hi Kenzie. It's Kathy. I just wanted to say hello and see how you're doing. I'm really sorry for how Kendall treated you. Please keep in touch with me. I miss seeing you around the house. I know the dogs, Yuma and the boys do too. J_

_Hi Kathy. I'm doing fine. No hard feelings about Kendall. Tell everyone I said hello and I miss them!_

_I'm glad there aren't any hard feelings. I was so sure you were the one for Kendall. The way he talked about you. And how he never wanted to leave your side. I loved how he always brought you over. It was nice having some estrogen around the house J. I will tell everyone you said hi. Please take care of yourself Kenzie! Love ya sweetie!_

_Thanks Kathy. Love you too._

I texted her a couple of times but then I began to shut her out as well.

Logan, Carlos, and James kept texting me wanting me to come out with them. I always turned them down not wanting to hear about Kendall or his new girlfriend. I especially didn't want to see them together. I was slowly slipping into a depression I didn't know how to get out of. It didn't help my sister was away on her honeymoon still and my brother and Tanya were on their babymoon. I felt alone.

Soon enough I cut off all contact to the world. I deleted my twitter, Facebook, instagram and any other social media network I had Kendall on. It was too painful seeing him with the blonde who had his heart.

A few weeks passed and I still wasn't talking to anyone. Just working, studying and going to school. I finally decided I needed to go to the store. On my way there I passed an animal shelter. I decided to stop in on my way home. My heart broke for all the animals without homes. I decided to adopt one. Maybe it would help with my loneliness. I picked out a light brown pug puppy no more than six weeks old. He was abandoned by his owner and I immediately was attached to him. After the adoption went through and all the paper work was done I took Milo home. I didn't want to change his name and confuse him. Besides he looked like a Milo.

Before I went home I took Milo to the pet store and went hog wild on spoiling him! He got a new bed, toys, bowls, and even clothes.

Milo and I made it home and he began to explore his surroundings. At least he was already potty trained, though I bought puppy pads just in case of accidents.

As Milo and I were starting to develop a relationship my doorbell rang. I didn't want to answer it. Whoever it was could go away. I wanted to spend time with my new puppy and I just wanted to be alone more than anything. But the knocking wouldn't stop. Finally I decided to answer it knowing the person wouldn't stop until I did. When I opened the door I saw someone I never thought I'd see again.

"Kendall? What are you doing here?"

He had tears in his eyes and my heart instantly broke for him.

_No Kenzie! You have to stay strong! He broke your heart first!_ I kept saying that over and over to myself so it wouldn't hurt so much when he left again.

"I umm needed someone to talk to and I didn't want the guys to see me like this and I didn't know who else to come to."

"Come in."

He slowly walked in with his head down. He looked up and took in his surroundings like he had never been here before. He noticed the dog items everywhere.

"Did you get a pet?"

"Yea I did. I was lonely so I adopted a dog."

"That's neat. What kind is it?"

"He's a pug. He's 6 weeks old and his name is Milo."

"That's cool."

"Yea a little different from your 2 dogs and pig."

We stood there in awkward silence just staring at each other not knowing what to say.

"So you said you needed someone to talk to?"

He nodded yes.

"Soo… Talk."

"Where do I begin?"

I think he was talking more to himself than me because he was shocked at my tone when I said for him to start at the beginning.

"First off. I'm really sorry for hurting you Kenzie. I really do like you and want to be with you a lot. But when Katelyn showed up at my place I couldn't help but feel feelings for her again. I never wanted to hurt you. Turns out she was letting me know she was getting married but wanted me to get together with my other ex Kayslee. Katelyn told me Kayslee still had feelings for me. I thought it would be easier to get into another relationship with someone I already knew and had been with. I didn't want to get rejected again. Not saying you would! Plus I was scared you wouldn't feel the same about me later on, once you've been around me. I thought if I had Logan come over here and talk to you it would make things easier. I guess I was wrong"

He paused gathering his thoughts and continued on.

"Anyway, Kayslee and I dated for a couple of weeks and then I found out she was just using me again for my career. She was still seeing her boyfriend while she was with me. As soon as I found out i broke it off. I know I never meant anything to her, she never cared about me like you do."

I honestly had no idea what to say to him. I was shocked.

"Look Kenzie. I understand what I did to you was awful. Especially having Logan tell you and not me and no amount of times I say I'm sorry will ever do because I feel worse than you will ever know. But I was hoping maybe we can try again."

"You really hurt me Kendall. I trusted you and you took that and threw it away for blonde bimbos who didn't give a damn about you."

"Kenzie I know. I just miss you. I've never felt this way about someone. Not even Katelyn or Kayslee. Please Kenz."

"I need time to think."

I couldn't look at him. I knew as soon as I did I would say yes and I needed to really think about all this. I could only imagine the look in his face.

"I understand. The guys and I are going to meet up in Hawaii with your sister and her husband as a little vacation before we head on tour. We all want you to go. We'll understand if you don't. I'll see you later."

As he walked towards the door, his shoulder brushed mine and I felt the sparks between us. The ones I've been trying to fight. As he left he laid an envelope on the table that had my name on it.

When he left I opened the envelope and found a plane ticket and housing information. I had so many thoughts running through my mind. Should I go? Should I give Kendall another chance? I only had 3 days to make up my mind about the trip. I couldn't just leave Milo here by himself. He would have to come with me. Would that be a problem?

I went to bed that night drained. Emotionally and physically. I didn't know what to do or how to feel anymore. I cared for Kendall deeply but I was so hurt by him I didn't know if I could ever get over it.

When I woke up in the morning I had a text from James.

_Hey girl! I hope you come on the trip with us! I really miss hanging out with you. So does_ Halston and Sam. And of course Carlos. Can't leave him out J please think about it.

I ignored the text for a couple of days while I went to work and school. My friend Madison told me to go on the trip. She said I deserved to relax. The poor thing didn't know about the Kendall situation. I didn't think I could relax with Kendall around. I already had my mind made up.

Later that night I texted James back.

_Hey what time do I need to be at the airport tomorrow morning?_


	5. Vacations & Make Ups

In an instant he replied.

_5:30 am __J__ don't worry you can sleep on the plane lazy head :)_

Oh lord. I wasn't going to be able to get up that early.

_Thanks. By the way is it ok if I bring my dog?_

_ Uh yea. Fox and Sydney need someone to play with!_

_ Great see you tomorrow._

Oh crap! I leave tomorrow! I have to pack myself and Milo. I know I have to tell my mom so she doesn't worry.

By the time I got everything done and packed and stopped shopping and running to a billion stores it was 1:30 in the morning. I figured I might as well stay up because I knew I wouldn't wake up in time. So I decided to bake. Something I haven't done in a long time.

I made Carlos muffins. Logan chocolate chip cookies. James' mini apple pies. And I couldn't leave out Kendall that would be rude. I made him mini cinnamon rolls. They could eat them before we boarded the planes. Knowing them they would be hungry.

I left my house at 4:45 and got to the airport 15 minutes before I had to. I checked my luggage and Milo in and sat in the chairs and waited for the boys to get there.

Of course they arrived after 5:30 looking tired and somewhat hung over. Logan especially. When they saw that I was actually there I was greeted with hugs and we missed you and I'm so glad you're here.

Kendall seemed happy I was there but he kept his distance. I gave the boys their little snacks. Saving Kendall for last. Carlos had his food gone within minutes while Logan barely touched his from feeling sick. James was the gentleman and ate his slowly. Kendall on the other hand wouldn't touch his. He put them in his bag for later. Trying to not let him get to me I mingled with the guys and caught up on everything. Turns out I missed a lot. They were filming their new video "Windows Down" in Hawaii and they wanted me to be in it. Plus they would be starting their new tour in the summer.

"Kenzie please be in the video!" Carlos whined.

"Um no thanks!"

"Ahh come on!" they all said together.

"NO END OF DISCUSSION!"

"FINE!"

After that we didn't talk for a while. At 7:30 our plane boarded and off to paradise we went.

I think all of us slept on the plane. Though we didn't have a very long flight, it was still nice to snooze while we could.

When we reached Hawaii we were greeted with leis and a driver. He took us to this mansion where we would be staying. It had everything. Except enough rooms. James and Halston got a room along with his dog fox. Carlos and Sam along with Sydney, his dog. Logan and his female companion, Lacy. So that left me and Kendall to share a room… and a bed together. Maybe Milo could sleep between us!

He seemed excited. Truth be told I was too. Just the thought to be in close contact with him again made me hyperventilate. Everyone agreed to go get something to eat and catch up on sleep and settle in our house. We were, after all, here two weeks!

After a nice brunch at a local hangout we respectively went our separate ways to sleep. I decided to unpack and try to avoid sleeping next to Kendall for as long as I could.

"Um how do we want to share the drawers and closet?" I asked him. I turned and seen Kendall playing with Milo. I tried not to smile at the sight but it was too cute.

"You can have this side of the drawers and I'll take the other side. As for the closet it doesn't matter. I guess we can just kind of go with it."

_"Wow Kenzie you couldn't figure out the drawers yourself?" I silently scolded myself_

"Ok that works."

"Well I'm going to shower and sleep. Is there a certain side of the bed you want?"

"The side closest to the window. I don't like sleeping close to doors."

He nodded and headed towards the joint bathroom in our room.

I unpacked my pillow and blanket. Two comfort items I couldn't live without no matter where I went. I also called my mom to let her know I made it safely. Soon sleep deprivation was getting to me and I tried to fight against it but it slowly won. I lay down on my side of the bed along with Milo and soon zonked out. I felt something get into the bed beside me. Too sleepy to care I turned towards it. Not caring and thinking it was Milo, I cuddled up next to it.

_"Wow when did Milo get so big?"_

Suddenly realizing I wasn't cuddling with Milo I woke up. Milo was curled up around Kendall's legs and Kendall was curled around me asleep as well. I just stared at the beautiful man beside me. So confused as to how I felt for him. I decided to go ahead and sleep like I was. Cuddled next to him with his arms around me.

Nobody woke up until around 6 or 7 that evening. Kendall and I didn't talk about the sleeping arrangement we found ourselves in when we woke up. We just kind of avoided each other. The group decided to eat on the beach and have a cook out. Kendall decided to play chef. I sure hoped he could cook. I decided I would make dessert and everyone else would make a side dish.

Dinner turned out really good and everyone talked and drank.. Maybe a little too much. Eventually Elle joined us with her husband Andrew. She was so happy and glowing. I was so happy for her, but silently wishing I had what she had. Halston and Sammy got the idea of doing shots. I was the only one who wasn't doing them until they talked me into it. After maybe 4 or 5 of them I started feeling good. I'm a light weight. Then I started drinking beer and whatever else booze I could find. Then everyone wanted to play truth or dare. No biggie. I could handle it. Until it was my turn.

"Kenzie truth or dare?" Halston said slurring her words and giggling.

"Truth. No, no, no dare! No, no truth! Truth." I said equally slurring my words as well.

"Do you like Kendall anymore?"

"Aww come on why you gotta get so heavy on me?"

All eyes were on me. Except for one pair of green eyes.

"Jjjust answer it you, kenzzie."

I giggled.

"Ok."

"Ok you like Kendall or Ok you will answer the question." James said.

"I'm going to answer the question. Truth be told. I like Kendall A LOT! But Kendall's really hurt me and I was very sad and I went into a depression and then I bought a dog to help with the loneliness. He only likes blonde girls so I don't have a chance no more. But I mean come on I adore the dude."

Wow I was really going to regret this in morning.

Everyone was looking at me again. Including the green eyes.

"Ok whose turns next?" I was trying to get the attention off me.

We continued to play and drink and the game came back to me again.

"Bring it on Logie bear!"

"Ok girl. Truth or dare?"

"I'm going to do a dare this time."

"I dare you to kiss Kendall." He busted up laughing and so did everyone else except Kendall.

I was so drunk I probably would have kissed a tree if I was dared to.

"Ok."

I set off to kiss Kendall but couldn't find him nowhere. I decided in my drunken stupor to look for him.

"Kendall's… Oh Kendall's.. Where are youuuu!?"

"Kenzie what are you doing out here by yourself?"

Boy did he sound mad.

"I came to find you and do out my dare and kiss you."

"I'm not doing it Kenzie. I'm not playing games."

Now I was mad.

"Not playing games? Are you f***ing kidding me right now! You played me over and over again."

"Yea Kenzie I know! And I said I was sorry!"

By now I was sure everyone could hear our screaming match.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry is all you ever say. You never do Kendall! You never proved how sorry you were. But no you invite me here and cuddle with me in bed knowing what it does to me when I'm close to you!"

"Well I didn't hear you complaining!"

"BITE ME KENDALL!"

And I stormed off or more like stumbled to the house. I was crying and not even close to sobering up so I fell on the bed and slept.

I woke up and didn't find Kendall anywhere in our room. I figured he slept somewhere else. I walked into the kitchen and no one else was up. I took the dogs outside and let them run around and do their business.

I stayed outside for a really long time playing with the pets when a figure sat down at the table with me. Then he spoke.

"Kenzie. I'm really sorry for everything last night. I didn't know I hurt you that bad when I was gone. I don't like all blondes I just prefer them. But you're different and I love that about you. You know when to put me in my place and you know when I need someone to just talk to. There's just so many things about you I love I can't name them all. Plus my family adores you. Especially my mom."

"It's ok. I probably shouldn't have drank. I should have known that as soon as I did I would start saying things I've held in. I'm sorry too by the way."

"I forgive you. What do you say we start over?"

"Hello do I know you?"

"Seriously Kenzie? I meant our friendship not the whole thing! I don't want you to run your cart into me again."

With that I had to laugh.

"Ok."

"And maybe we can see where things go from there."

"We'll see."

The rest of the day I went surfing with James and Halston. Then cliff diving with everyone. The boys were filming everything they were doing for their video. A lot of the times I filmed so I wouldn't be in any of it. What bothered me the most was the locals hanging all over them. I could tell it was upsetting Halston, Sammy and Lacy as well. I particularly didn't like when they were all over Kendall. I know I didn't have any room to be upset since I wasn't his girlfriend but if things progressed more between Kendall and me I didn't want to have to worry about another girl interfering.

Kendall began to notice a change in me whenever one of the girls would go around him. I wouldn't look at him or hang out with him. Slowly he began to have the girls back off. It still didn't help that they were around but at least they weren't hanging on him.

Carlos got the idea to go hiking to a waterfalls in the valley. Of course the local girls tagged along just so they could be in the video. Kendall was very cautious around me. I think he was afraid of saying the wrong thing. But helped me when I needed help over things and walked with me. It felt natural to be around him.

When we got to the falls we wasted no time in jumping from the top and into the refreshing water. Kendall and I jumped a few times together. Always holding hands. I couldn't deny the spark I still felt for him. He and I swam together and didn't really leave each other's side.

After a while we decided to hit up a local beach, just us as the group, and play volleyball.

"Hey Kenzie?"

"Yea Kendall?"

"Can you put sunscreen on my back?"

"Sure hand it here."

This felt so natural touching his skin again. I took my time to make sure the sunscreen was evenly rubbed into his skin. Rubbing over his tattoos and shoulders. I mean I couldn't let him get a sunburn.

"There you go!"

We both let out a sigh from the loss of contact between us.

"Thanks. Ready to go play volleyball."

I just nodded. I preferred to just watch him play but I couldn't act like a Debbie downer so I joined in on the fun.

It was Kendall, Logan, Lacy and me on a team against James, Halston, Sammy and Carlos. Our team won 2 games out of 3. By the time the evening rolled around and everyone was leaving the ocean we were all wiped out. We just grabbed food on the way to the house and went to our respective rooms. Kendall got a shower first while I ate and then I did inviting the warmth of the water on my skin. When I was finished and walked to the bed Kendall and Milo were already under the covers watching Family Guy. I wasn't sure if I should be in the bed too and I stood there for a while debating when Kendall motioned me to get into bed.

"I put pillows in between us so we wouldn't cuddle or anything else."

He could see you frown.

"I thought we made some progress?"

"Yea we did but I don't want to pressure you or rush you into anything."

"I think the pillows can go. It doesn't leave us much sleeping room."

He quickly discarded the extra pillows on the floor and I climbed in the bed next to him. We didn't touch but our shoulders were close to each other. As I watched TV I heard faint snores coming from somewhere I assumed was Kendall, but when I looked over he was still awake. He smiled and pointed to Milo.

"How cute! I didn't know he did that!"

"Yea it is pretty adorable."

"Kendall?"

"Hmm..?"

"Can I umm you know cuddle up against you? I'm having a hard time falling asleep. It's ok if you don't want me to. I'll understand."

He didn't say anything. Instead he wrapped his arms around me and brought me closer to him. As I lay my head on his chest, he kissed my head. We both fell asleep soon after.

The next few days in Hawaii were amazing. Some days me and Kendall would go do things on our own and other times we were with the group and other times is was just us girls. Kendall never came out and said I was his girlfriend but he sure was acting like it. He constantly wanted to buy me things. There were a few things here and there I would let him but not everything.

We only had one day left in Hawaii and Kendall and I decided to take a walk on the beach. The boys were finished shooting their music video and everyone wanted to do something. But Kendall asked me to stay back with him. As we were walking along the beach I picked up a couple of sea shells to take home. He held my hand and I would walk with my head on his shoulder or arm, seeing as how I couldn't really reach his shoulder. Kendall let go once to go find him a shell to take home. Instead of one he came back with quite a few. He got one for his mom and for each set of grandparents, one for his room and one for me. He handed me mine and it had a message on the inside of it.

**_All I really want to be is your boy-boy-boy-boy-boy-bboy-boy-boyfriend._**

I looked up at him a little confused. I knew it was part of the lyrics to their song "Boyfriend" but I wasn't catching on to why he wrote it on the shell. And then he started to sing.

"Have you ever had the feeling you're drawn to someone?

And there isn't anything you could have said or done."

By the time he was finished I got the hint he was asking me to be his girlfriend.

"So can I be your boyfriend?"

"I'll think about it."

I walked away smiling. I turned to see his mouth was hanging open in shock. After a while I walked back with a shell of my own to give him. I handed it to him and he read it and looked up at me with the adorable dimpled smile.

**_All I really want is to be your girl-girl-girl-girl-girl-girl-girlfriend!_**

We found a spot on the beach and sat in perfect harmony and watched the Hawaiian sunset sink into the ocean. These 2 weeks have gone by really fast.

The next morning everyone got ready and we headed to the airport including Elle and Andrew.

Kendall and I didn't get to talk much but I was hoping we'd get to on the plane. Then we were told we would be taking a different flight so the boys wouldn't be seen with any of their girlfriends when we arrived at LAX. They didn't want the fans to attack us. I could see security's point but I was disappointed I wouldn't get to be with Kendall. I decided the best way to talk to Kendall was to text him.

_I'm really glad I came on this trip. See you in California :)_

_ I'm glad you came to! And you decided to be my girlfriend 3_

_ Soo… I have a question._

_ Sooo. What is it? _:)

_ Are you coming back to my house or are you staying somewhere else?_

_ I'm going to go see my mom for a bit and then come to your house. Sound good?_

_ Yep :)_

_Hey! You should come with me to my parents' house! I know my family has been dying to see you!_

_I guess I can make time for you ;) I would love to see your family._

_Yay!_

_You're such a dork! But I love you that way!_

After the last text, our plane took off. When we arrived at LAX first, I couldn't believe the fans there already waiting to see the boys. Everyone went their respective ways and went to their own homes. I got home and got Milo situated and then left for the Schmidt house. I decided to clean my house and do my laundry, pay bills later. But I did call my mom.


	6. Telling the Family

I was nervous to be at the Schmidt's house again. Especially after everything happened between me and Kendall. Would they accept me being his girlfriend instead of just his friend.

"KENZIE! OH MY GOSH HONEY IT IS SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!" Kathy was yelling as she was walking up to me.

"Hi Kathy! It's good to see you too. I've missed you guys!"

"Come in! Come in! Everyone wants to see you!"

We walked into their house and Kendall was talking to his brothers and his dad. They stopped as soon as they saw me in the doorway.

"So Kenzie, did you like Hawaii? Kendall told us something excited happened between you two!"

"I loved it there. I may have to move there someday. And what did Kendall tell you." I was giving him a worried look.

"Just that you two are finally hooking up!" Kevin, Kendall's older and middle brother said.

"Kevin! I did not say hooking up! I said we were together officially! Big difference there bro."

"Well you'll be hooking up soon enough."

"Kevin Schmidt that's enough!" Kathy scolded him.

I stood there looking like a tomato, so embarrassed by the conversation that just happened.

Kent, Kendall's dad, smiled at me and gave me a one shoulder hug.

"Get used to it Kenzie. Those boys will be teasing you non-stop now."

I smiled at the man Kendall favored. Though sometimes he looked like his mom.

We showed them all of our pictures from Hawaii, including our seashells that decided we would be together. Then we played with his pets. After that I left to get home and get my house in order before Kendall came over that night.


	7. Another Vacation

By the time I got home and I was done cleaning my house and taking care of Milo, I was wore out. So I took a shower and changed into my pajama bottoms and t-shirt. I caught up on my TV shows when my door knocked.

Kendall was finally here and he had his overnight bag. I guess he planned on staying for a while. This was fine by me!

"Hey, sorry I took so long. My mom wanted to catch up on everything! And to talk about you while you weren't there."

"No big deal, I hope it was all good things she said. Plus I'm just glad you actually showed up this time."

I tried to make it sound like a joke but Kendall took it the wrong way. His face dropped and looked sad.

"I'm sorry Kendall. I was trying to make a joke out of it. I won't bring it up."

"It was all good things. My family approves of you. But I need to talk to you about something important."

My stomach turned upside down and I lost all the blood in my face. Kendall could see I was beginning to freak out and tried to reassure me it was nothing bad.

"So as you know the guys and I leave for tour in a while and we wanted you to come with us."

Slowly the blood starts creeping back up into your face. Then what Kendall said started to sink in. I thought about it for a couple of minutes and decided I wouldn't be able to go.

"I would love to but I can't just leave my job and school and everything."

"That's the thing. We want you to come on tour as our pet assistant and Elle's assistant. You know take care of our dogs and stuff while we tour and we're going to pay you! Plus you can help Elle out with us. You know she needs it! We know you love our dogs plus Milo can come too. And since you're going to school for animal work it will be great for you. I already looked into you doing your classes online. Which you won't have many because its summer vacation. So what do you say?"

He looked at me with pleading eyes. Everything was trying to process in my head at once and it was almost too much to handle. After everything sunk in, I changed my mine.

"I'll go with you on one condition."

"What's that?"

"You have to meet my parents."

Now his face was the one to fall.

"Seriously? Isn't your dad like in the army and like a colonel and knows how to fire an AK-47 and all that stuff?"

"Yea. But he only does that when he works."

You were trying to joke with him but he was absolutely terrified.

"Kendall it will be ok. I've already met your family and that wasn't so bad. I was terrified of meeting your mom because I knew you were a momma's boy."

"But your dad has guns and weapons he can kill me with Kenzie! Really big guns! And my mom knew you before we became a couple! Plus she adores you!"

I laughed at him. He was being ridiculous but adorable.

"Kendall I swear to you it will be ok. I will tell him no funny business while we're there. And my mom will make sure he behaves. Besides I haven't seen them in 6 months. My sisters growing like a weed and I miss them. And I want to share with them one of the best things that's happened to me since I got here."

"Ok I'll go. But wait what's the best thing that's ever happened to you here?"  
"Yay! I'm going to go tell my mom. And really Kendall. Think about it."

He registered what I said and smiled bigly at me while I was on the phone with my mom.

After I got off the phone I went to tell Kendall the arrangements.

"So instead of us going to South Carolina. My family's coming here. All of them, grandparents included. They want to see Jeremy and Tanya since she's due soon with the twins, so they figured they'd come here."

"Well that makes me feel a little better."

"They want to go to Disneyland."

"Really that's awesome! Am I allowed to go?

He acted like such a little kid at times! I think that's what makes me fall for him more, is his passion for everything.

"When will they be here?"

"Couple of days. Your family is more than welcome to join us too."

"I'll go call them."


	8. Big Bad Daddy

The next couple of days me and Kendall got to know each other more and more. We both went to the airport to pick up my family. I had to rent a van just to haul them all. When they came out of the terminal we greeted everyone and made introductions. Kendall was nervous as hell but he was doing great!

"So you must be the boy who stole my little girl's heart." My dad was acting stern and all tough. This made Kendall stutter and nervous.

"Yyess ssir. I mean I didn't steal it. I don't do things like that but I hope I get to always have a piece of it until she decides to give it to me wholly." His face was so red.

My dad smiled at what he said and shook his hand.

"Well then all I have to say is you better take care of her then. That's my baby there."

"I will sir."

"Please call me Frank. I feel old when people call me sir."

"That's because you are dad." I said giving him a hug.

We left the airport and drove to Anaheim to Disneyland Parks. We were meeting Kendall's family there. We decided to work out the room situation when we got there. My family had their own suites and so did Kendall's family. My father wasn't too thrilled about me and Kendall rooming together but my mom reassured him it would be ok. After Kendall and I got settled we went to my parents' room and decided to take molly to the beach so my mom and dad could get settled in and unpacked.

We met up with Kathy, Kent, Kenneth and Kevin and started to play on the beach. We made sand castles and buried Kendall in the sand. Molly liked that, she really liked stepping on Kendall's figure in the sand. He was so cute with her. Soon my parents joined us and started snapping pictures of the hilarious things we were doing. Molly bonded really well with Kendall and me. The whole time we were at Disneyland there wasn't a moment Kendall and I weren't together. We got matching mickey and Minnie mouse ears. So many pictures together, though I knew I wouldn't be able to share them online because no one knew Kendall and I were together except for close friends and family.

All too soon our second vacation ended and my family headed back to South Carolina.


	9. The Tour

When Kendall and I got home we had to get ready to for the tour. His mom helped us out a lot. She said she would take care of my house while we were gone. In a couple of weeks we were on the road kicking of the "Better with you Tour" in Columbus, Ohio.

The boys have been on tour for a month now and things are going great except Kendall and I can't display any love for each other except for when we're alone on the bus or hotel. We can't go out in public together and it's getting hard on us because we want people to know we're together. It's really hard seeing girls give Kendall their numbers. I know he wouldn't do anything with them, it's just the thought that I'm his girlfriend and can't tell them to back off.

I was sitting in Kendall's dressing room with the dogs when everything hit me about our relationship and the secrets we had to keep and I started crying.

"Kenzie what's wrong babe?"

"Nothing' I'm ok."

"No you're not your crying Kenzie. What is it."

"I just wish we could tell people about us and maybe it would help with the stress I have of us sneaking around. It's not fair Kendall. I know you said it wouldn't be easy and I could handle that but I can't handle being told when I can and can't' see you or kiss your or even hug you."

By this time I was in hysterics. Ranel they guys' head security guard came in telling Kendall it was time to go onstage.

"Kenzie I'm sorry. Mom will you hang out with Kenzie?"

"Sure honey." She gave him a good luck pat and came and sat down beside me.

He kissed my head and walked out and headed to the stage.

"I'm sorry Kathy! Go out and enjoy the show. I'll be ok. I'm just emotional right now."

"Nope, I'm not leaving your side. Sweetie I think you're doing a great job at this. I know it's tough especially since your relationships new but if you were any other girl, they would have made him choose between them and his career and I'm so thankful that you're not like that. He loves you so much. I know he hasn't said it to you yet but he really does. Things will get better for you two. Trust me." She smiled warmly at me.

"I trust you."

She grabbed my hand and I gained my composure and we went out to watch their performance. It never failed how many goose bumps I got when I saw them. Elle and Ranel came up and made sure I was ok.

Soon the boys were in full swing and were beginning to sing "Covergirl" when Kendall said something.

"Hey Guys! How's it going? Are you having a good time?"

He let them cheer and scream before he continued.

"Before we do this next song there's someone special who should be out here with me. This person has been my rock these past few months. Even though we've been through A LOT of ups and downs they've never stopped believing in me. And I love this person very much. So if you guys wouldn't mind if they came out for the next couple of songs I'd really appreciate it."

"Kathy I think he's going to call you out on stage!" I yelled to her.

She shook her head no and smiled at me.

"Then what is he doing?"

Again the crowd cheered and screamed. By this time Kendall's family was behind. I figured it was his mom he wanted onstage. He's never told me he loves me so I knew it couldn't be me he was talking about.

"Kenzie would you please come out here? Everyone give it up for Kenzie Elizabeth Sherwood… my Girlfriend!"

Everyone was pushing me towards the stage and Carlos, Logan and James were pulling me with them. As soon as I reached Kendall he was beaming from ear to ear.

"No guys its ok. I'll just stay back here and watch. Choose a little girl from the audience."

Those boys wouldn't take no for an answer. Finally they got me to Kendall. He was laughing at me.

"Kendall what are you doing?" I whispered.

"Everyone say hi to Kenzie!"

I did a little nervous wave and Kendall whispered "Trust me."

I sat on the stool next to Kendall and the other boys while they sang "Covergirl" to me and then the other 3 boys went out to get their "Worldwide girls".

The song was near the end when Kendall wrapped himself around me and looked in my eyes and sang "Cause you have my heart"

He then gave me a kiss.

"I love you Kenzie."

It was the first time he said he loved me. I had tears in my eyes.

"I love you too Kendall."

All the ups and downs we went through got us here today.


	10. Moving In

Kendall and I have been dating for a while now. The tour is finally over. It's so much nicer knowing that people know we're together and we don't have to hide. Kendall and I are settling into our house together. He decided he wanted to move in with me during the tour. Kathy was sad at first but she was happy for him and I. today was moving day.

"Holy crap Kendall! You seriously have too many shoes and clothes! How many pairs of Vans do you need?"

His room was a disaster zone. He smiled at me and started putting shoes into boxes and into bigger boxes.

"Where are we going to put all of those. I already gave you half of my walk in closet!"

"Chill sweetie they will fit!"

He knew what I was about to say next.

"That's what she said!"

"You are such a dork Kenzie!"

"That's why you love me!"

"True. Plus you do make some awesome cinnamon rolls."

I threw a pillow at him and smiled at the boy who was mine.

A few hours later Kendall was all packed. Getting him unpacked in my house was a different story. My house was big for just one person and I didn't have a lot of stuff but I still stressed where he was going to put everything. After a couple of breaks and a couple of hours later, he was finally unpacked. I must say it was nice adding his touch to the house.

"I think we should adopt a dog together. What do you think Kenzie?"

"I think we should wait a bit and get used to us living together before we add another member to the family."

"Ok but can I at least research the kind of dogs that would be good for us?"

"Knock yourself out babe. Speaking of knocking out I'm going to bed. Care to join me?"

"Can we.. You know.. Do it tonight?"

"I don't think I'm ready yet Kendall. I want it to be special for us. Mostly for you since it's your first time."

"Ok. I guess I can wait a little longer. It's not like I've been waiting 21 years!"

"Why are you getting mad Kendall? I don't want our relationship to be built on sex!"

"It doesn't have to be. I don't understand why I can't be intimate with you besides cuddling!"

"I'M…NOT…READY!"

"THEN MAYBE I'M NOT READY TO LIVE WITH YOU!"

And with that he walked out the door. This was the third time we've fought about sex. He was ready and I wasn't. I've been with someone before and that ended badly. Plus I haven't been feeling myself and I knew I should see a doctor. Trying not to think about our fight, I got a shower and went to bed. Kendall had a key. I couldn't worry about what he did all the time when he left me mad. I know he went to his mom's house to vent and that he was safe there. I didn't know if he would come back this time.

It was late when I felt something settle in beside me. I turned and found Kendall with red and puffy eyes from crying. And Kendall was drunk.

"Kenzie I'm so sorry sweetie. I know you want to make things special for us! I understand where you're coming from. It's just that I want to be close to you in more ways than one. But I promise I won't say anything again until you tell me. I love you."

"It's ok. I was worried you weren't coming back after what you said."

"I was so mad. I didn't know what I was going to say when I opened my mouth. I never want to leave you. Ever."

"Can we talk about this in the morning. I'm so tired."

He laughed quietly at me and settled his arms around me. I knew by the time I woke up in the morning I would be spooning him instead of him spooning me.

When I woke up the next morning, Kendall was still passed out in the clothes he wore last night. Beside him his phone was buzzing. I slowly picked it up and looked at it.

_Hey Baby! I had so much fun last night! We need to do it again_

_ Xoxo Kayslee_


	11. Moving Out

My heart dropped to the floor. I felt my stomach turning. This could not be happening. Kendall and I just got settled into a great relationship.

Kendall started to stir in his sleep and I quickly put the phone back next to him. I went into the kitchen to start my day and act like nothing happened. Maybe he would bring it up. I just prayed he wasn't cheating on me.

After a couple of hours Kendall came into the kitchen.

"Hey"

"Hey. Did you sleep well?"

"I guess so."

There was awkward silence between us for a few minutes before I finally spoke up.

"I think we should talk about last night. I don't think you remember much of it."

"I remember all of it Kenzie."

"Ok well then I'm sorry that I won't give you what you want and that you have to go elsewhere to find it."

"What are you talking about?"

"Just don't Kendall. Don't play dumb with me." I whispered. Tears already threatening to fall from my eyes.

"So what I went out and drank to loosen up and get my mind off things! What's the big deal?"

"The big deal is that you slept with someone Kendall. Someone that isn't me!?

By now I was crying and his face was red with anger.

"No I didn't Kenzie!"

"Then why in the hell is Kayslee texting you?"

Then Kendall's face went pale and he became rigid.

"Why were you looking through my phone?"

"I didn't look through your phone Kendall. It kept going off. I figured it might be important if someone wouldn't stop calling and texting you."

I looked at him and saw his face was full of regret.

"You slept with her didn't you?"

No answer.

"DIDN'T YOU!"

No answer again.

"I can't believe this. I'm such an idiot. I knew this was all too good to be true. I should have known i could never be happy. That's the story of my life. I'm never allowed happiness."

"Kenzie… I don't know what I can say or do to make this better. I'm sorry."

"Just get out. Don't come back. Get out. I'm done."

"No Kenzie! Please. I'm sorry!"

"Get out!"

"Please baby!"

We were both crying by now. I couldn't even look at him. I have never felt so betrayed in my life. I went to the bedroom and started packing his things. I could never look at him again or forgive him.

"Kenzie what are you doing. Kenzie don't! Please Kenzie! I don't want to leave you! I made a mistake!"

I didn't say anything. I just handed him his bag and locked myself in the bedroom.

A few minutes later I heard the front door shut. Then I collapsed and cried until I felt I couldn't cry anymore.

Elle came over and tried to comfort me. I knew she had her own problems so I told her to leave. I didn't want her here.

After a while I decided to go for a drive. After about a 3 hour drive I ended up at Jeremy and Tanya's house. I knocked on their door and Tanya answered.

"Hey guys! Sorry to just drop by un-announced, but I was in the neighborhood and decided to see my Godchildren."

"Oh my gosh! Kenzie! It is so good to see you! Come in!"

"Hey baby sis! What's going on? Wow you don't look good."

I pulled out of his hug with tears already in my eyes.

"Hey Kenz. I was just kidding I didn't mean to upset you."

"It's not you Jeremy. It's Kendall."

Just saying his name made me cry harder.

"What did he do?"

"He cheated on me and I kicked him out. We hadn't even lived together for a day and things already went to hell!"

Jeremy was fuming. Tanya tried to comfort both of us.

"Kenzie I'm sorry he did that. I wish I knew what to say sweetie."

I just cried some more. By that time Jeremy disappeared. Tanya and I looked at each other when we heard his car start and him pull away.

Tanya called Jeremy to see where he was going. I knew exactly where he was going and I couldn't let either one of the two people I loved get hurt.

_You might want to hide. I think Jeremy is coming to find you._

_ You told him?_

_ It was hard not to._

_Kenzie I'm sorry. I love you. I'll take the beating your brother gives me. I deserve it. The guys want to kill me too. Hell I want to kill me for what I did._

_Dont say that. I know you're sorry and that you love me. It's just that can't be with you anymore. You can get the rest of your stuff tomorrow. I'm going to stay here for a few days._

_I can't change your mind?_

_No._

_I'm so sorry. I will always love you. I give you my word on that._

I couldn't text him back after that. I couldn't tell him I loved him. I knew I did but I couldn't say it to him. I didn't want to give him false hope.

I was helping Tanya with the babies when the front door busted open. Jeremy came walking in sporting a bruised and swollen hand. My stomach turned upside down I got sick. I didn't want him to hurt Kendall. I knew he deserved it but it hurt just the same as if I were getting beat up.

"He won't ever bother you again."

He pulled me into a hug and I started crying. Sad part was is that I wanted him to bother me again. I wanted him to be with me.

A few days later I decided to go home. I didn't want to overstay my welcome at Jeremy and Tanya's.

"Call me if you need me Kenzie."

I hugged Tanya bye.

"Call me if you need a babysitter."

I gave the twins hugs and kisses bye.

"Love you babies!"

I hugged Jeremy last. His hand was doing better but I think he was starting to regret beating up Kendall. I couldn't be mad at him. But at the same time I felt like I was.

"Love you baby sis. Remember I'm a phone call away."

"Love you too."

I drove home with an empty feeling in my stomach. When I arrived back there was a moving van outside my house. I dreaded this moment. I was hoping he had everything moved out before.

I parked my car and went inside. I spotted Carlos and Logan talking in the corner. They gave me a small sympathetic smile when they saw me. I was about to go talk to them when I heard Kendall's voice coming out of my bedroom.

"Hey guys I have a few more boxes I want to move. I want to get everything out before Kenzie…gets…home… I didn't know you were coming back today."

"I felt I was overstaying my welcome there."

"Oh. Well we'll be out of your way soon. I took the pictures of us. I figured you wouldn't want to see them."

"Ok."

I finally looked up at him and saw all the bruises and cuts on him. My poor boy. All I wanted to do was hold him and take care of him. But I couldn't do that.

I walked outside on my back porch. Milo was out there playing. He went to me as soon as he saw me. I began crying knowing that Kendall would never sleep in the bed next to me. He would never wake up next me to again. I didn't want him to go but I couldn't trust him either.

I heard the glass door open and Logan came out.

"Hey beautiful."

"Ha thanks for the compliment. I know I am far from beautiful."

"Oh Kenzie but you are. I'm so sorry about you guys. I was really hoping things wouldn't end with you two. He loves you. He regrets everything. I just hope you can forgive him someday. I'd hate to see you soul mates never together again. Also me and the guys are here for you Kenzie. We still want you to work for us as our assistant. You have friends in all of us."

"Thanks Logan but I'm not going to work for you guys. It's just too hard. I got my old job back at the vet clinic. I can't promise I'll keep in touch. I just need time to think. But I love you guys and I love Kendall. I just can't be with him right now."

His phone started to vibrate in his pocket.

"Well everyone's done. It's time to head out."

"I'll go in and say goodbye."

Logan and I walked back into the house and spotted the rest of the crew standing by the front door. I went over to James and Carlos and hugged them bye and then Logan. Kendall was the last to leave.

"One last hug?"

I nodded yes and wrapped my arms around him one last time.

"You don't know how much I love you Kenzie. I will always love you." Kendall whispered through tears.

"Me too Kendall."

We pulled away from each other after a few minutes and I wiped the tears from his face. Slowly he turned towards the door and walked out.


	12. Confrontations

I started working back at my old job and things were finally getting back to normal for me. I was never going to be over Kendall but I had to try to forget about him for now. It was hard seeing him do interviews and saying he was single and what he wanted in a girl. I could never stand to listen to them for more than a few minutes.

I was finishing up with a patient when someone called my name.

"Kenzie?"

What the hell did Kayslee want?

"Can I help you?"

"Can we talk?"

"I'm working right now. Why don't you go screw someone else's relationship up?"

"I really want to explain."

"Explain? You slept with Kendall. You knew he was with me. And you still slept with him and played with his emotions. You are a bitch! I'm done with all this crap. I'm tired of always having to fight for my happiness, tired of people saying they love me and screw me over! I'm done with all these games! You wanted Kendall. You got Kendall! Now leave me alone. Do not ever come back here again!" I was trying to yell quietly but soon everyone could here.

With that I walked away leaving everyone around me stunned at my outburst.

I finished my shift. I was expecting to get reprimanded by my boss but she just told me she was proud of me for finally standing up for myself.

But to make matters worse when I got off work. Kayslee was standing at my car waiting for me.

"Just give me five minutes Kenzie please. That's all I'm asking."

"You better make it a quick 5 minutes."

"Yes I slept with Kendall. I love Kendall. I don't want you two together. So I broke you up and now he doesn't want me. He wants you. So you need to tell him to move on and be with me."

Was this bitch serious. I seriously thought she wanted to have a serious conversation. I looked at her with a smug smile on my face.

"Go to hell"

I got into my car and drove away. I knew exactly what I had to do.

"Hey mom."

"Hey baby girl! It is so good to hear from you!"

"I know it's been forever. Sorry about that. How's dad? Have you heard from him yet?"

"I heard from him about a month ago. He was doing ok. Are you ok?"

"To be honest no. I'm coming home mom. This place isn't for me anymore."

"I'm so sorry baby. You know you are always wanted back here."

"Thanks. I will be there in a week."

"Ok I will get your room ready for you."

"Thanks mom. I love you."

"I love you too buttercup."

I drove to the nearest Wal-Mart and staples to pick up boxes. I immediately got to work packing up my house. I know it seemed like I was being a coward running away. Truth was I couldn't take it anymore. I needed a place where I could heal and home was just the place. I was getting into packing heavily when my doorbell rang.

"Logan? What are you doing here?"

"Hey Kenzie. I wanted to see how you were doing. I haven't heard from you in a while."

"Oh yea sorry. I've been busy with school and work and Milo, I'm lucky if I have any time to myself. You want to come in?" I lied to Logan. I was miserable.

"Yea sure."

Logan walked in and started to take in his surroundings.

"You moving?"

"Umm… well… I decided to move back home. I just don't fit in here anymore and I just need to leave. It will be better for everyone if I do."

"How can you just leave? Doesn't anyone mean anything to you? What about the guys and me and you sister and brother. What about Tanya and the babies. What about Kendall?"

The last part stung.

"What about Kendall? We're not together anymore Logan."

"I have never seen someone so depressed in my life Kenzie. He's lifeless. He works, sleeps and barely eats. He's a walking zombie."

"That's not my fault Logan. He should have thought about that when he slept with another girl."

"He knows he screwed up! Kenzie I can't stand to see him like this. Or you like this. You have never ran away from anything and now you're running from everyone who loves you here."

"Logan, you need to leave. I may be running but at least I didn't screw someone else and ruin any happiness I thought Kendall and I had."

With that final statement Logan left. I know he was trying to be a good friend but I didn't need it right now. I needed to focus on getting my life started over. As I was packing I found a few of Kendall's things and some pictures from Hawaii of us. I found the sea shell he gave me asking me to be his girlfriend. I found the matching one asking him to be my boyfriend. I put them in a separate box along with whatever else I found that was his.

I notified the school that I would be transferring to South Carolina University. I figured I should tell Kendall I was leaving so I didn't give him anymore false hope and I needed to give him his stuff back.

_Hey can you come over today? We need to talk._

_ Yea I will be there in 20 minutes. Is that ok?_

_ Yea that's fine._

I waited for Kendall to arrive. I wasn't sure how I was going to tell him about me leaving. Maybe I shouldn't tell him at all. All my stuff was on its way to South Carolina so he would notice everything gone but me and Milo.

I heard a small knock on my door and answered it. And there stood a tormented man with a sad smile on his face.

"Hey, come on in."

"Thanks."

Kendall instantly noticed everything was gone.

"You're moving aren't you?"

"Yea. I'm going back home."

"Are you ever coming back?"

"I'm not sure."

"I see."

"I found some stuff of yours while I was packing. I figured you'd want it back."

"You could have just mailed it to me."

"I know but the shipping would have been too much for 2 large boxes."

"Where are they?"

I went to get his boxes and when I came back I found Kendall sitting on the floor crying.

"Kenzie… I-i-I'm so sorry. Please don't leave! Don't leave California! Don't leave me! I need you Kenzie! And you need meee! We love e-e-each other! We were meant for each other!"

"Kendall please don't cry… I wish I could stay. It's just too hard sweetie. You broke the trust we built in each other. I don't know if I can trust you again. I love you Kendall. Always know that. But I can't be with you now. I want to be your friend."

"We can fix it! We can work things out. We did it in Hawaii! Maybe me and you need to go away for a while and work on things. No distractions! Please don't let me lose you!"

By this time I was holding him and crying. I didn't want to leave him but I was scared to stay.

"I'm sorry Kendall. All I can be is your friend right now. I love you so much it hurts. I will always love you. Maybe someday we can try again but right now it's best if we have a break from each other."

"Promise me! Promise me you will always love me and we can try again someday. Kenzie please."

"I promise Kendall."

He nodded and got up. He was getting ready to walk out the door when he turned back at me.

"If I can't be with you, I can't be your friend. It would kill me to know if you were out there dating someone else and it's not me. So I can't be your friend if you're going to see someone else."

"I don't plan on seeing anyone else Kendall. I'm going to focus on school and graduating and my family. They need me right now too."

"Ok."

"I will keep my promise Kendall. You just have to give me time build that trust up again."

"I love you Kenzie."

"I love you too Kendall."

As he left I stood there wondering if I was making the right decision.

Standing there I heard my phone go off.

_I would rather be your friend. Then to not have you in my life at all. I want you to be happy. I love you._

_Thank you Kendall. That means a lot to me. I love you too._


	13. Forever & Always

_~Present Day~_

"Ok Kenzie you ready?"

"I was born ready for this day. I've worked my butt off to get here!"

It was my graduation day. I was finally graduating college today. Elle, Andrew, Jeremy, Tanya and their kids were all here for this day. The only person who wasn't here was my dad. James, Logan, Carlos and Kendall decided to come and support me as well. We were all friends, including me and Kendall. We still loved each other very much and we slowly worked on building the trust back. We weren't together but I planned on keeping my promise to him.

Mom was gathering around having me get pictures with everyone before we had to leave for the ceremony.

"Ok Kenzie, now with the boys."

I stood between Carlos and Kendall. Logan and James stood on either side of Kendall and Carlos. We had to pose for so many pictures. Making silly faces, hugging, laughing. Mom got one with me and Kendall staring at each other and smiling. That one was my favorite.

My grandparents arrived after and Kendall and I were pulled out of our trance. We took more pictures and it was time to go.

"I'm really sorry your dad couldn't be here Kenzie. He's so proud of you. But you know the army comes first."

"I know mom. I just miss him is all? It's been almost 2 years since I've last seen him or talked to him."

"I know buttercup."

We got to the venue and we were mingling with people before the ceremony when my mom walked up to me.

"Kenzie someone's on the phone for you."

"Who is it?"

"Just look!"

I looked down at the tiny screen and saw my dad. I started smiling from ear to ear.

"Daddy!"

"Hey baby girl! I'm sorry I can't be there today but I wanted to tell you how proud of you I am and how much I love you."

"Thanks daddy. I love you too!"

"I got to go now sweetheart but know I'm thinking of you today and I wish I was there!"

"Me too daddy. Please be safe and take care!"

"I will. Love you! Bye."

"Love you too. Bye."

I was wiping the tears from my eyes as it was time to line up and start the ceremony.

Everyone gathered into the venue and the ceremony began. Finally it was time to get my diploma.

"Kenzie Elizabeth Sherwood."

I walked across the stage and received my diploma. I heard a whole bunch of cheering and I knew it was my family along with the boys. I smiled widely as I made my way back to my seat.

"May I present to you the class of 2012!"

We threw our caps in the air. I didn't throw mine far. I was afraid I'd lose it.

I made my way to my family and friends after the ceremony.

"How does it feel to be Dr. Kenzie Sherwood?" Carlos asked.

"It feels pretty awesome!"

"Ok guys we have to get back to the house. Everyone will be there for the party." Mom said.

We made our way back to my parents' house. Mom said the party up in one of our barns so we'd have enough room.

The party was in full swing, when everyone decided to give speeches. My family had some embarrassing moments to tell, especially Jeremy. And of course my mom had the sappy emotional toast. I wasn't expecting anyone else to say something but my family. So I was surprised when I saw Logan, Carlos, James and Kendall get up on the small platform. Kendall had a guitar in his hand. He smiled at me and winked.

"Ok guys, so I know everyone was making nice little toasts and speeches for Kenzie. But we put something together for her since her dad couldn't be here." James announced.

Carlos was setting up a slideshow and Kendall was tuning his guitar. Soon a picture of me and my dad popped up and the guys started to sing worldwide. As the song and slideshow was closing to an end a video popped up of my dad holding a sign and saying "cause you have my heart." He smiled and waved into the camera.

By the end of the presentation there wasn't a dry eye in the house including the guys. I was about to turn to go to the boys when a figure stopped me and grabbed me into a bear hug.

"I'm so proud of you buttercup!"

"Daddy?"

I started crying more and just hugged my dad for a few minutes.

"I thought you were overseas?"

"Well thanks to General Holden and your mom and your friends up there I got to be here today. I've been hiding out for a day so you wouldn't see me. I didn't want to ruin what those boys put together for you."

"I'm so glad you're here! Give me just a second ok?"

I went up to the guys and hugged them.

Logan whispered "It was all Kendall's idea."

When I got to Kendall I gave him a kiss on the forehead and hugged him tight. I didn't want to let him go.

"Thank you for that Kendall. You don't know how much that meant to me."

"I'd do anything to make you smile Kenzie. I love you."

"I love you too."

I went back to my dad and family and was mingling. Later in the night I snuck away to sit on the beach with my blanket, when I felt his presence.

"Hey Kendall."

"How did you know it was me… wait I know cause of the tall, lanky figure."

I smiled.

"That and your smell. Sit with me."

Kendall sat beside me and I turned towards him and met his pair of green eyes.

"So I was thinking…"

"Uh oh! That's a scary problem!"

I play shoved him and he caught my hand in his and I didn't pull it away.

"Hey, you're forgetting I'm a doctor of veterinarian medicine."

"Oh yea that's right. You're one smart cookie."

He pulled the hand he was holding up to his mouth and kissed it.

"But seriously. You know how I made you that promise that when I was ready and I figured all my crap out that I would try us again?"

"Yep. I've always held onto that promise. I haven't been with anyone since then. I've been figuring my crap out too."

"Well I was thinking we can try again. I was offered this great job by this band who wants me to be their personal veterinarian while they're on tour. So it means I would have to move back to California and I would be so much closer to you."

"Are you serious? Kenzie please don't be joking with me! I've been waiting for 18 months for this."

"I'm dead serious Kendall. My feelings for you haven't changed. If anything they've gotten stronger. Logan was right. You are my soul mate."

"He usually is sometimes."

We both snickered.

"So who's the band you're going to be working for?"

I gave him a "are you serious look" and he caught on.

"Seriously! You're going on the road and everything with us? Kenzie that's amazing!"

"Yea it is pretty amazing. I want to go slow Kendall. I don't want us to rush into anything. But I do want to do this."

I kissed him with all the passion I had. I climbed on top of him and started running my hands down his chest. His hands were cupping my face keeping me in the kiss. Slowly I started to lift his shirt off his head and ran my hands down his chest across his sculpted muscles. I laid him down onto the blanket and started kissing my way down his chest. When I reached his belt I undid it and undid the button on his pants. I could feel him getting harder. He pushed his pants off and went to work getting my dress off. He undid my zipper in the back and threw the dress over my head and started making his assaults on my neck and chest.

Kendall's moans were becoming more erratic with every kiss and touch. He unclasped my bra and threw that somewhere to the side.

"Maybe we should stop. What if someone comes down here and sees us Kenz?"

"It's ok. I'm the only one who knows about this spot. We're safe. Unless you want to stop?"

I raised one eyebrow at him.

"Hell no!"

And with that he flipped me so I was on my back. He started trailing kisses down my stomach when he reached my underwear.

"These have to go NOW!"

He ripped them off of me and went to work between my legs.

"Oh hell Kendall!"

I had my hands tangled in his hair. Pulling with each string of pleasure. He started trailing kisses back up to my mouth. I reached down to stroke him through his boxers. I received a big moan.

"I want you so bad."

With those words I started to shuffle his boxers off and he kicked them to the side.

He looked down at me in the eyes and told me he loved me. Then he plunged into me. It was pure ecstasy. With each of his thrusts I bucked up to meet them. Soon Kendall was starting to get harder and harder with his thrusts and soon we both reached our climaxes.

Kendall pulled out and rested his head on my chest.

"That was amazing. I thought you wanted to take things slow?"

"I did. But I've been waiting almost 2 years to do that with you and I wasn't about to wait any longer."

"Ready for round 2 then?"

He waggled those eyebrows at me and I started to laugh.

"Sorry cowboy that was a one-time thing for now. We really got to take things slow from here on out. I couldn't resist myself with the way you looked today, but I really want us to work this time."

"I know me too, but it doesn't mean we can't have fuuuunnn!"

I giggled and said I would think about it.

We found our clothes and put them back on. I tried my best to fix my hair. I told Kendall to try and not to look like we just had sex for the first time with each other. It didn't work. Logan started teasing us as soon as we got back to the party. Which we walked in hand in hand. Everyone started cheering and congratulated us. Hopefully not for the sex. Kendall pulled me aside and handed me a little black velvet box.

I gave him a worried look.

"It's not an engagement ring. Just open it." He rolled his eyes at me when I sighed a breath of relief.

I opened it and saw a ring with my birthstone and Kendall's shaped into a heart. On the inside it was in scripted Forever and Always, I Promise.

"It's a promise ring. I figured it's a good way to start making promises to each other. The forever and always I promise means that I promise to love you forever and always and that I will always be there for you and I promise I will never hurt you again. I love you."

"Forever and always."


End file.
